Cara’s Story

My name is Cara and I am a resident of Lewiston, Maine. I am also a small business owner.

We often hear about paid leave as it relates to giving birth or adopting a child, and how paid leave allows time for parents and a new baby to bond. The time I had with my daughter after she was born was less about being able to bond - though of course we did that too. It was frankly all I could do to make it through my maternity leave.

Throughout my three months of unpaid maternity leave, I was brutally depressed and anxious. I had an absolutely horrendous time breastfeeding. When I was about to throw in the breastfeeding towel, we found out (via a terrifying episode) that our daughter had significant allergies. Formula for this kind of allergy wasn’t covered by our insurance, and would have cost us $700-$900 a month. I recommitted to breastfeeding and entirely overhauled how I ate so I could keep my baby fed and safe. I stayed up for hours overnight pumping milk with a hospital grade breast pump. 

It’s not an exaggeration to say I am not sure that I would have been able to function if I had to leave my daughter and go to work - all while trying to figure out how to manage these health challenges and appointments. 

I understand that my story is one of significant privilege. I was lucky that I was salaried and had an understanding employer. I was lucky that we could afford for me to take time unpaid, and/but we could only do so after months of saving and because my husband’s salary was much higher than mine. I was lucky we had nine months to plan. I was lucky I had nine months to save up as much sick and vacation time as I could, rarely taking sick or vacation time - all while managing a difficult pregnancy. 

However, as things currently stand, I’m not sure we would be so lucky. We certainly wouldn’t be if there was an emergency. Our finances are far less flexible now that I own a small business and we have the added (and significant) costs of raising a child. And of course, as a small business owner, I only get paid as much as I pay myself. Without a statewide program that supports all workers, I wouldn’t be able to afford to pay myself for taking leave. But you can be sure that if my business ever gets to a point where I can employ others, I’ll be first to offer paid leave even if it means I don’t get paid. 

And - I hope we don’t need to continue to address challenges like these via individual actions. Maine needs paid leave. It’s an embarrassment that in the United States, we are doing this in such a piecemeal way. But, as we all know - Mainers lead. Mainers help Mainers. We show up, whether it’s helping to get your neighbor’s car out of a snowbank, checking on our older neighbors, or making a casserole to give to new parents.

If we have to lead this charge, then so be it.

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